so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
