her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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