WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
