if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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