He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
