i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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