How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm like, not good at living.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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