its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
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