This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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