The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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