this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
