It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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