none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
