I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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