Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize