What a fucking waste of an outfit
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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