is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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