so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
