All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
