I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
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