Whats the glycemic index on semen?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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