Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Randomize
