If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
