1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
