there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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