I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
