i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Randomize
