omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
