If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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