Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
