KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize