Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
