Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Randomize
