One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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