yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Houston, we have a blender
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
