yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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