My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
