I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
