it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize