We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
A bitchslap is in order.
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