and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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