i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
