you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
