So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
he puts the penis in happiness.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
