But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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