I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
