Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
