Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Did you just see the Batmobile???
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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