She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
we're chasing vodka with high fives
4 words: hood of his car
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
