she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Are my feet made of real feet?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Randomize
